04 October 2011
Wiggling bums and a whole lot of fabric
There are thousands,probably millions of products out there promising you the 'perfect bum.' You have to apply the product to your bum like ten times a day and have to use a buffer brush that both cost a weeks pay to fight the evil cellulite, using a round circle motion that gives you a dead arm for the rest of the day. Or you have to do lunges,squats,clenches and the infamous plank that I swear took at least 5 years off my life the last time I tried it. Ugh,I think I'll stick to avoiding mirrors and long cardigans thanks. So what is the perfect bum? According to a very reliable expert a.k.a Mr.Boyfriend it has to be 'Round, squidgy,curvy,extremely soft and you have to be able to pinch and grab it. Oh and it can't be too hard.' No pressure there then ladies.
The reason I'm talking about our secret obsession and some what neurosis is because a very clever Korean artist, Aamu Song has created a dress that can be worn by 238 people,yes you read that right. It is created with lovely Kvadrat classic 'Divina' wool fabric.The dress is made with over 550 metres of fabric,stretches 20 metres in diameter and spreads out for 10 metres in all directions over the floor surrounding the 3 metre high bodice. God imagine trying to get on the tube with that.
The dress was created for the London Design Festival at York Hall and was presented by The Finnish Institute in London, that ran from the 22nd to the 25th of September. So the Second Hand Rose is just a tad behind.
Aamu designed 'REDDRESS' for a performer to stand in the bodice of the dress and the audience to lie in the pockets under one of the four layers of skirt. Each performer had to climb up a concealed staircase to fit into the body. Performers included Finnish vocalist Emma Salokoski, guitarist Jarmo Saari and a string quartet from Britten Sinfonia. Aamu came up with the idea for the dress when trying to find a way of adding an extra dimension to an artistic performance. 'The gown-like the sound of a piece of music spreads and enfolds the audience,drawing them even further into the peformance.' So basically they just ran out of seats and had a load of fabric lying around. Aamu also said 'REDDRESS aims to question the roles we play as the participant or performer,as well as elevating the experimental boundaries of this versatile relationship.' If anyone can translate that into english,please send it in on a postcard.
The dress is gorgeous and amazingly well made with the clinched in waist and the puffy shoulders that Joan Collins from Dynasty would be proud of. If anyone doesn't know what Dynasty is check it out,full of 80s fashion and shoulder pads that make you look like a rectangle. Anyway, I think the poor people that had to sit at a sewing machine for not hours, but days deserve a big round of applause. So ladies the next time you have a bottom crisis,just remember that your dress does not have to consist of 550metres of fabric to cover your bum and there doesn't have to be a wooden structure made to conceal your assets. I'm sure those performers did ask themselves if there bum looked big in it. Anyone would if they had 238 people sitting in their dress. So all you small bums,big bums,soft bums,jelly bums,flat bums out there be proud of your posterier and flaunt your blessings. Just remember when you are on the beach or out at night,every other girl is so concerned about what they look like, they don't notice your wobbly bits. The only people that look are men and they just like anything that move lets face it. Even if your bum does look big in a pair of jeans and you could qualify for the squidgy bottom olympics,don't worry because join the club with another 3 billion women out there. I think I'll go and make some club t-shirts. Ones that accentuate the bottom of course.
Second Hand Rose